Fire & EMS Leader Pro The job of old firefighters is to teach young firefighters how to become old firefighters!
By: Robert Avsec, Executive Fire Officer
I recently received an email from a firefighter who shared her lived experience with harassment, discrimination, retaliation, and the lasting harm that can result when organizations fail to act. While her story is personal, the issues she described are systemic—and they demand more than quiet acknowledgment.
Dear Battalion Chief Avsec,
I just wanted to thank you for speaking up for the many victims of harassment, sexual or discriminatory. As you
Photo Source: Rebecca Nietert, July 8, 2018
know and you report most women are not listened to even when they come forward. Many of us stay silent for years and endure more than what anyone should ever have to on the job where we should be allowed to be safe and protected as our male colleagues. If a woman has come forward it has to have been bad; unfortunately, coming forward for most of us puts us into another realm of victimization.
I was demeaned, harassed, humiliated, and treated differently just because of my gender by one male lieutenant on my department for years until I was about to break. I kept silent because I knew my department was aware of this and that they were not going to address it.
My female lieutenant and I had gone through similar experiences when we became the first truck to have two females. As the first two females on the same truck my lieutenant and I were mocked, questioned, and ridiculed at every call for the first two years. We were excluded from some trainings and have always been made aware that we are not the same when it comes to “being part of the brotherhood.”
When my lieutenant finally tried to address it, she was told she was being inappropriate. Even though my lieutenant was of rank she had to have a male lieutenant handle the matter for her and moderate the conversation. No other male lieutenant has ever not been able to directly handle this same situation or been forced to have a moderator.
After we both complained about the same male lieutenant the city made me feel like the bad guy and has done everything in their power to ignore the issue. I filed an MCAD complaint which can take years, and I gave up my pump operator position that I loved and worked hard for and placed myself in dispatch for my sanity and safety after getting treatment for PTSD that was a result of the treatment I endured at work.
Imagine, I the victim having to give up my position to protect myself from my abuser who remains in a supervisory
role and is now on the promotion list. He is rewarded with no serious disciplinary action other than sensitivity training while I the victim lose more to stay safe! Sensitivity training just sends the message to everyone else that my complaint is not legitimate but that the city did something to cover themselves.
As a RN and full-time firefighter, I never thought I would ever be one of the people who would ever get PTSD. I thought I was tough, I didn’t realize how slowly over time anyone can get PTSD because a body cannot sustain living in fight or flight [mode] daily.
I have endured so much in my 21 years on this department and yet coming forward has only isolated me more. We now have 4 females, and the two younger ones have made friends with the guys their age; however, the two younger ones have also been sexually assaulted, harassed, or discriminated but they are keeping silent like I did (except for the sexual assault which that female reported to the police and it was handled in court).
I wish I had a court to hear my complaint because the mayor, HR, and my department have done everything to bury me and my complaint. The city refuses to talk to my attorneys. Basically, you can make a complaint, but a city and HR have the power to keep it from going forward. The victim has no power and the ones with the power continue to protect the abuser because they don’t want to be held accountable for the abuser’s behavior; there is no justice in a system where the ones in power are the judge and jury!
I would never make a false accusation against anyone. I would never put someone’s livelihood at risk unless what I was reporting was true. My department continues to make sure we females don’t have a primary voice in hiring or training.
My lieutenant is now in charge of training and every time she does something the guys don’t like, for example scheduling too much training, she gets put in check by the Deputy Chief who tells her to change things to appease the guys. Every time I ask to be involved in training, teaching, hiring I also get told they will hear what I have to say but that is as far as my involvement goes.
I just can’t wait to retire in a little over two years to get out of this hell I am forced to endure!
This system won’t change until more men speak up for their sisters. I know there are many good male firefighters out there but if they stay quiet, they are just as guilty as the bad ones for not stopping these behaviors.
Women don’t want special treatment; they just want the same treatment which means being respected and able to speak up and be heard just as their colleagues.
Read Next: Sexual misconduct: The poison that affects everyone
Advocacy Statement
Harassment and discrimination in the fire service are not isolated incidents or “personality conflicts.” They are indicators of cultural and leadership failure. When individuals are mocked, excluded, silenced, or punished for speaking up—particularly women and other underrepresented members—the damage extends far beyond the individual. It erodes trust, compromises safety, and undermines the integrity of the entire organization.
It must be said plainly: no one should have to surrender their career, their health, or their sense of safety in order
to be protected from misconduct. When victims are forced out or marginalized while those who caused harm retain authority, the message is unmistakable—and unacceptable. That is not accountability. That is institutional harm.
We also need to confront an uncomfortable truth: trauma in the fire service does not only come from the emergency scenes we respond to. It can come from working day after day in environments where harassment is normalized, complaints are minimized, and leadership chooses convenience over courage. Recognizing that reality is not a threat to our profession—it is necessary for its survival.
Policies and training alone will not fix this. Real change requires leadership that listens without defensiveness, believes without bias, and acts without delay. It requires transparent processes, meaningful consequences, and a refusal to protect individuals or reputations at the expense of people. Most importantly, it requires men—especially those in leadership and supervisory roles—to speak up, intervene, and challenge damaging behavior every time it appears. Silence is not neutrality; it is permission.
Women in the fire service are not asking for special treatment. They are asking for equal treatment—for respect, dignity, safety, and a real voice in the profession they have committed their lives to serving. That is not an unreasonable demand. It is a basic expectation.
I will continue to use my voice to advocate for accountability, cultural change, and systems that protect people rather than institutions. Listening to lived experiences—even when they are difficult—is where meaningful reform begins. The fire service must do better, and we are accountable to those who serve within it to ensure that we do.
